This is a character I’ve been thinking about since possibly elementary school. I’ve created a whole world for myself to explore in my writing. This will showcase the first story in that universe—more specifically, an early rendition of it. This story will be delivered via short animation. Plus, at the end of this post is a rough character design draft. Be warned that there are very dark themes and graphic violence, and language.
This is draft one of The Knight. I kept the story simple to ensure I made it from beginning to end. I like to do this and expand later. That way, I at least have the start and finish outlined with details. After showing this to several people, I got a lot of positive responses, but it needed more. It was too simple in its current state and needed some complexity. My original problem with this was I wasn’t sure what I wanted to save for the next story in this universe and what I wanted to reveal now. The biggest problem I had, however, was originality. This character is a mixture of Deadpool, Batman, and Iron Man. There are elements that I used from these characters’ universes to help this character come to life.
Here is draft 2, which in my opinion, drastically changes everything about what’s happening. In draft 1, this was just a futuristic vigilante taking down a crime ring; now, it’s more of a revenge story while stopping a crime ring. I’ve also revealed the idea of the multiverse coming into play, with doppelgangers being the villains of our hero. I also showed some of the origins of the protagonist. As well as the new things I added, I fixed some small things to make the story feel a little more original. I got positive feedback on this one as well, but it didn’t seem to be enough. I wasn’t entirely sure where to go from here, and it was a good amount of thinking before I figured out how I wanted the origin to continue.
The number after two is… Thats right! It’s three! Here is the next draft of the story. I’ve added more origin story. I’ve done some cleanup with dialogue and added more conversation between Jennifer and The Knight. My hope with this one is to give more information on the Knight and the Evil Knight. This draft doesn’t address all of the notes I received from draft 2, but does work on a few of them. It’s getting closer to completion, and the next draft will cover more of the notes I received. One of those notes was requesting that I give more story to the trafficking ring. To give the women there a chance to shine, and I agree. I just haven’t figured out the how in that quite yet.
This is draft four, also the current draft of the screenplay. I still haven’t entirely figured out all of the notes from draft three, but after receiving more feedback I saw that the first flashback needed reworking for clarity’s sake, as well as needing to tone back the execution of the Evil Knight. I see you wondering, but Cole, there’s only one flashback. Not anymore. I’ve revealed more of what happened the day that The Knight became who he is in another flashback toward the end of the story. I still need to work on some of the clarity for the first flashback, but I think it’s getting better. The only other thing I have to think about now is giving the women in the warehouse more story because they are an important aspect of the plot. They’re what allow the Knight to learn from what he does.
Anyway, those are the four drafts I have so far. So it’s time to see the character design for The Knight.
Here he is! Keep in mind that this is a rough draft and isn’t entirely done yet, but I really love the look of this. This was drawn by my childhood friend Nate Dalrymple. He’s looking to go into animation, so I hit him up about doing some early work. I also have my brother, Clay Janes, working on location designs since he’s going for a degree in architecture. I figured he’d have a little fun with the warehouse and alleyway. I look forward to seeing the designs and story evolve into their final versions.